What if you actually DO have enough energy?
Mental space > extra caffeine
I wrote something last week that I can’t get out of my head.
It was the final prompt of the final session of
’s wonderful Women on the Verge writing workshop. Amy shared a passage from Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s Gift from the Sea, and then she gave us the following prompt:“The shape of my life today starts with:
But I want first of all —”
“More energy,” I wrote immediately.
I’ve been exhausted this month. April has been one long sprint of thing after thing after thing, and on this particular day, I wanted desperately to crawl into bed and sleep for a week.
But the words kept coming, and through that strange magic of putting pen to paper, I taught myself something profound. I wrote:
Perhaps I was wrong. I do not lack energy; indeed I seem to have it in excess. I lack the space to contain and channel it before it boils over.
Does that hit you as hard as it hits me? Because it hits fucking hard.
I do not lack energy. I lack space.
I recognize that this isn’t true for everyone, but right now, for me, it is so true it hurts.
Energy can be replenished, even manufactured (more coffee, anyone?). But space is a finite resource. If I want more space for my creative work, I must reclaim it from somewhere else.
Just as importantly, I must believe that space is worth reclaiming. I must be willing to say no, even if it disappoints someone else.
I must be willing to choose my art.
This changes everything.
This is so real. It took me a long time to realize I had to take from somewhere else to get thar space AND that it was ok to do so.
Hi Robin, this resonates a lot. I keep thinking about grounding where you’re saying space…like the more I ground, the more foundation I give myself (my body- it seems to all start in the body & nervous system!) and then I can hold energy and have the capacity for it to expand!